Finding Master Right Read online

  Finding Master Right

  Sparrow Beckett

  InterMix Books, New York

  An imprint of Penguin Random House LLC

  375 Hudson Street, New York, New York 10014

  FINDING MASTER RIGHT

  An InterMix Book / published by arrangement with the author

  Copyright © 2015 by Sparrow Beckett.

  Excerpt from Playing Hard to Master copyright © 2015 by Sparrow Beckett.

  Penguin supports copyright. Copyright fuels creativity, encourages diverse voices, promotes free speech, and creates a vibrant culture. Thank you for buying an authorized edition of this book and for complying with copyright laws by not reproducing, scanning, or distributing any part of it in any form without permission. You are supporting writers and allowing Penguin to continue to publish books for every reader.

  INTERMIX and the “IM” design are trademarks of Penguin Random House LLC.

  For more information about the Penguin Group, visit penguin.com.

  eBook ISBN: 978-0-698-19852-4

  PUBLISHING HISTORY

  InterMix eBook edition / July 2015

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

  Penguin Random House is committed to publishing works of quality and integrity. In that spirit, we are proud to offer this book to our readers; however, the story, the experiences, and the words are the author’s alone.

  Version_1

  To Jason Momoa’s eyebrows.

  Contents

  Title Page

  Copyright

  Dedication

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Epilogue

  Acknowledgments

  A sneak peek at Playing Hard to Master

  About the Author

  Chapter 1

  “Hey, that guy’s cute. I wonder if he’d let me give him a blow job.”

  Kate arched a brow at her friend. “Uh, I think your collar’s on too tight. That’s your husband.”

  “I know.” Janine sighed dreamily. “Did I tell you what he did to me last night?”

  Kate’s cheeks heated. They didn’t have many TMI moments between them, but Janine had been getting more graphic lately. She guessed it went with the exhibitionist streak Janine’s husband never let her explore.

  “Ugh.” Janine groaned, then stood from the couch they’d been lazing on. “Someone spilled red wine on the carpet. I’ll be back.” Walking backward across the living room, she fake-smiled and said, “Look happy and approachable!”

  Kate rolled her eyes. For the past hour, she’d been doing just that. But she was afraid her happy-and-approachable face looked very much like a single-and-desperate face.

  With a discouraged sigh, she scanned the living room, taking in the array of Halloween costumes. Heavy metal played in the background, pumping up the gritty feel of the decorations. Her best friend, Janine, had busted her ass trying to imitate the dark mystery of the underground BDSM dungeon she belonged to. Kate had only been there once, briefly, for a bondage demo, but now it featured as the setting for most of her fantasies.

  In the corner of the room, a muscular blond caught her attention. He wore a red cape and carried a large hammer. His long hair swayed as he moved his head to the beat. Standing at the finger food table, a shirtless man wearing camo pants and dog tags shoveled about a dozen pigs in a blanket into his mouth. Despite his ravaging the snack table, his dark skin and a strong jawline gave him major sex appeal. Another guy brushed past him, balancing on tall heels, dressed as Dr. Frank-N-Furter from The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Cross-dressing wasn’t her thing, but she had to admit he wore the costume well. Her gaze swept over him from head to toe. Damn, his legs looked better in fishnets than hers did. Upon closer observation, she spotted the chain around his neck. A subtle nod to a Master or Mistress?

  How many of the attendees were Doms? And which ones? Since first exploring the world of BDSM, she’d learned not to judge based on appearances. Thor looked like the type to take control in the bedroom—strong, confident, one hundred percent male. Or maybe that was her libido talking. She’d seen some pretty macho guys fall to their knees for the right person.

  That was her too. On the outside, she was a no-nonsense, don’t-take-shit-from-anybody kind of girl. But somehow she knew the right person would make her melt. She just had to find him.

  Janine was supposed to be signaling which ones had potential to be a good match, but playing host kept her busy. A few guys had wandered over, drunkenly flirting, and she’d shooed them away.

  Growling in frustration, she sat back on the couch and eyed the party food on the table. Her stomach grumbled. Starving herself all day to look better in the corset she’d borrowed had backfired.

  Pessimism wouldn’t get her a Dom, and she hated pity parties, so binging on junk food and sulking wasn’t an option. She just had to trust Janine to play matchmaker.

  Finally, she spotted her friend on the other side of the room, whispering in Jack Sparrow’s ear, then gesturing toward Kate on the couch. Shit. The pressure was on. Janine had gone through all the trouble of setting this up for her—if she didn’t at least get a guy’s number, all of this work would have been for nothing.

  Kate shamelessly checked the guy out. His dark goatee made him look wickedly sexy, even if it was fake. Dark, devilish eyes met hers, then narrowed. Yes, please. Sign me up.

  After a nod and a smile for Janine, he strolled toward Kate. Damn. She gripped the couch cushion to keep from chickening out. A sexy pirate was coming her way and even his swagger was hot.

  Straightening her shoulders, she gave herself a pep talk. Calm, cool, and confident. Just like she was with her clients.

  He stopped in front of her.

  With an uncharacteristic gulp, she looked up. “Hi.”

  “Kate?”

  Ugh. Even the way he rumbled her name made her all shivery. “Yes.”

  He grinned, revealing crooked teeth. Up close, he wasn’t as handsome as she’d thought—it was his costume that gave him the sex appeal—but she wasn’t exactly a supermodel, and she didn’t expect that in a guy either. “Janine told me to introduce myself to the pretty kitty on the couch. That must be you. I’m—”

  “Jack?”

  He chuckled. “No. Vince.”

  Short for Vincent? Even his name was pretty damn sexy.

  “Nice to meet you.” She scooted over so he’d have room to sit down.

  As he obliged, a whiff of his scent hit her. Cologne. She almost choked on it. Someone needed to tell him not to bathe in it.

  “Do you want a drink?” he asked.

  “Isn’t the rum gone?”

  He leaned back and let loose a burst of laughter. “You’re funny. I like that. Janine says you’re looking for a Dom.”

  Her cheeks heated. When he put it that way, she sounded like a cheap loser. Needing someone to play matchmaker in order to get a date certainly didn’t make her feel pretty. But was it her fault she was picky? Or that her fantasies were so kinky that vanilla guys were out of the running?

  Unsure of what to say,
she shrugged and looked in the other direction. This was more awkward than she’d thought. Couldn’t they just make a list and check off boxes? Kick it old school, like an arranged marriage?

  Unfazed, he continued. “What kind of things are you into?”

  Other than actually finding a partner, that was the biggest problem. She had no idea what she was into. Domination sounded good, but terrifying. Browsing social sites for kinksters only made her more confused, and a little creeped out. She couldn’t even count the number of unsolicited cock shots that had been messaged to her from admirers since joining. Maybe she should consider them compliments.

  But here was a real live Dom, sitting next to her. This was her chance to get what she wanted—and she always got what she wanted. That is, when she knew what that was.

  “I’m not exactly sure,” she answered. “I have zero experience.” Other than that one night at the club, and being a bit of a voyeur with Janine and Chris, she hadn’t experienced much firsthand.

  Chris and Janine were her main connection to kink. Though she didn’t watch them play, the dynamics didn’t have to be obvious to be effective. Chris had a damn good Dom eye. One arch of the brow had Janine zipping her sassy mouth shut. When he crooked a finger, she walked, like the other end of a magnet, to his side. He smacked her ass when she teased him, which only made her do it more.

  Although every feminist, social-worky bone in her body told her it was traitorous to want to submit to a man, Kate wanted to try it. Keyword try. Besides, she and Janine had talked about this at length—wasn’t part of feminism being in touch with her own sexuality and being unapologetic for what she was into? She had major doubts she could submit her will to anyone, but it starred in so many of her fantasies that not trying it seemed silly, even though fantasy and real life rarely matched up. She’d made a profile on two websites but it hadn’t amounted to much aside from opening her eyes to some fetishes that shocked her. So much so that it’d turned into a joke between her and Janine. There’s always weirder on KinkWorld they’d say when faced with anything out of the ordinary.

  Vincent—she decided to call him the sexier version of his name in her head—leaned against the couch, drawing her attention back to him. “Everybody has to start somewhere. Maybe we can figure it out together. What kinds of things turn you on? Pain? Being told what to do? Being shared?”

  Shared? She grimaced. He expected her to answer that? Normally, she wasn’t the blushing type but right then her face felt two shades past tomato. Talking turn-ons was too personal, too fast. She laughed nervously. “I don’t think that’s a good place to start.”

  “Well, some things I can guess, if it’s easier for you. You’re looking for a Dom, so you must be submissive.”

  She stared at him. Was this type of forwardness typical of Doms? Apparently small talk wasn’t his forte.

  But how to answer his question? The idea of someone inflicting pain—small amounts—was one of her biggest fantasies. And admittedly, some of the photos she’d seen—women on leashes, kneeling at men’s feet, heads bowed—were pretty damn hot. She’d like to try spanking, at least once. Maybe bondage, but she needed full control. Forget a safeword; she wanted to direct every moment. That didn’t bode well for being a submissive. She knew that much.

  Janine often teased her, calling her a rogue sub—a brat with no one to control her. She’d scoff and pretend to be offended by the idea. Truthfully, it was fascinating. She’d seen Janine challenge Chris, seen what it had amounted to for her friend. What would someone like Chris do with someone like Kate?

  And could anyone make her crave submission? She’d seen the blissful look on Janine’s face when she knelt at Chris’s feet. She’d daydreamed about someone making her feel that way too. To have that deep connection to and synchronicity with another person seemed almost impossible, but somewhere, deep inside herself, she thought she was capable of that. In admitting it to herself, she felt as though she’d put the universe on notice. Unfortunately, the universe expected her to do some of the footwork.

  “I don’t think I’m sub material,” she answered, after an awkward pause. Why had she said that? Maybe because seeming too eager wasn’t attractive? Then again, his response would also show her a bit more about him.

  “No?” Vince’s body language shifted. Instead of lounging, relaxed, his features sharpened, shoulders straightened, and he edged toward her as if he’d just found a delicious challenge. “I’m pretty good at taming bratty girls.”

  Oh boy.

  Some of the Doms she’d encountered online had big ego problems. She didn’t want an egomaniac swinging a flogger at her, safeword or not. Something about this guy was making her want to hit the brakes. Was it too much to ask for a nice, humble man who liked to spank naughty girls once in a while? At least to start with. Maybe her expectations were too high. Reading erotic novels did that to a person.

  “I’m not a brat, and I’m not a meek, innocent thing,” she warned him.

  “All the better.” His smile was sinful. “Let’s go to my place. I have some things we can experiment with.”

  His place? They’d just met. “Um. I don’t think so.”

  “Why not? I’m friends with Chris. You can trust me.”

  As a rule, she never trusted people who said “you can trust me” whether they had a referral or not. “It’s too soon. I’m not comfortable with it.”

  “I thought you wanted a Dom. There’s one sitting right here.” He gestured to himself. Who even did that, like they were the hottest guy ever? She did her best not to look around the room to see if there was a prank show taping this. “This might be your only chance. Don’t you want to know what your deepest desires are? Haven’t you been fantasizing about this for a long time?”

  Well, yes. But with him? His pick-up lines stunk as bad as his cologne. Was she crazy to think this was too fast? Maybe it was normal speed in kink time. Chris and Janine wouldn’t steer her wrong, right?

  He stood up, his costume rustling, then held out a hand. “Come on. I only live around the corner. Let’s see if we can make some of your fantasies come true.”

  Really? Did he just say that? Make my fantasies come true? It sounded like a cheesy line from bad porn.

  He sighed in frustration, then snapped, “My patience only goes so far, girl.”

  Warning bells went off in her head. Doms were bossy, but this guy didn’t know her well enough to have that right. So, fuck him, even if he was the hottest pirate she’d ever met. “No. I’m not interested.”

  He growled, but she’d dealt with men nastier than him in her job. It would take a lot to intimidate her. “I thought this is what you wanted. What’s your problem?”

  “Obviously, it’s you,” someone said from behind her.

  She swung her head in the direction of the voice. A tower of well-muscled man had appeared. With dark hair and tattooed arms, he gave an impression of quiet menace. He stared the pirate down.

  Kate sat there, stunned. Where had he come from? There was no way she could have missed him earlier, so he must have just arrived. He hadn’t looked her way, but maybe she could fix that? Even if he wasn’t into anything kinky, she was willing to throw herself under that bus . . . er . . . man.

  “Why don’t you mind your own business?” If Vince thought he was going to order this guy around, he seemed sadly mistaken.

  The mystery man took a step toward Vince, his body relaxed but ready for trouble.

  Uh-oh. Was this turning into a Dom-off? She was starting to feel as though she’d been transported into a medieval movie, and she was the damsel the two knights were dueling over. Maybe she’d slip away when they weren’t looking.

  Finally, Vince shrugged. “Have her, then. She’s too mouthy for me anyway.”

  As he slunk off, she let out a breath of relief.

  Her champion snorted, then turned to look at her. His brown-eyed gaze locked with hers. It felt like someone had snapped a rubber band in her abdomen. This man was going to
eat her alive and make her beg for it.

  Then, the intense air of command seemed to drain away, and with it went her urge to rub up against him like a cat in heat.

  Like any other normal guy, he pointed to the seat next to her. “May I?”

  She slid to the other side of the couch but nodded.

  “I hope that was okay.” He gave a small, apologetic smile. “I’m sure you could have handled that yourself, but Vince pisses me off. Pressuring people isn’t right. He gives my kind a bad name.”

  His kind? Meaning male? Or was he a Dom too?

  “No one should expect you to play the first time you meet them.” He smiled grimly. “Or even the second or third time. It’s your decision when the time is right or if you’re even interested.”

  She nodded. “This whole thing is starting to seem like a pipe dream. Between the egomaniacs online and that pushy pirate, I’m starting to regret this.”

  His brow furrowed. “Regret what?”

  “All of it. Getting into kink. This party.”

  “Why the party?”

  He didn’t know? She studied his face. It read as confused but honest. Maybe he wasn’t a Dom. Or maybe Janine didn’t like him. She glanced around the room, then caught her friend’s gaze. Janine’s eyes widened as she stood frozen, watching them. What the hell did that mean?

  Kate raised her brows in question. Her friend shrugged, then nodded her head in approval, her brown curly hair bouncing with it. Well, it wasn’t exactly a glowing recommendation, but it would do. She’d have to grill her about it later, after she strangled her for sending Vince the Pirate to plunder her booty.

  The polite and gorgeous knight in shining armor waited for an answer. Unlike Vince, he didn’t reek of cologne. He smelled clean, natural, as though he’d just stepped out of the shower, not doused himself in order to hide something. The only problem was his Dom vibe had evaporated.

  Should she tell him the truth about the party? It was almost embarrassing now. “Um. Janine and Chris threw this party to help me find a Dom.” She’d thought Janine had invited only other kinksters, but maybe she was wrong. There were a lot of people there. Surely they weren’t all from the club they used to go to.